Eat the Donut

Not too long ago, I had a serious craving for a donut.

When I was younger, friends and I would do a Dunkin Donut run when the spirit moved. Even early in my marriage, I recall doing the same to enjoy a weekend morning savoring the sugar delight. My favorites were glazed and lemon or strawberry-filled ones.

Donut runs were not common events, and donuts have rarely been a craving of mine, which is why this one surprised me. I don’t recall the last time I wanted a donut, but this craving persisted. And persisted.

I’m pretty good at abstaining from eating things with no nutrient value. And donuts definitely have no nutritional value whatsoever.

I’m also conscious of prices and spending money, even small amounts, because small amounts add up, on unnecessary and indulgent things. It’s the question of needs versus wants when on a budget.

Don’t get me wrong. I occasionally treat myself to what could inarguably be considered a want, not a need. I think most of us can recognize that in ourselves.

But a donut? A donut?

No, a donut was a pure want and one outside my normal cravings – like a crumble cookie or baked potato with butter, sour cream, and chives 😋.

For weeks, each time I went to the grocery store, my taste buds lit up, and I talked myself out of getting the donut.

Then, one day, I walked into the grocery store and decided enough was enough. I wanted a dang donut, so I was going to get one. Or two. I set aside the rationale that I could spend the money on something more nutritious and delicious and went to the pastry area. Oh, the smell!

When I got home and thoroughly enjoyed each bite of the sugary confection of two donuts while drinking a mug of tea, I felt a whole body and soul delight. I have no doubt I had a contented smile on my face.

Why am I sharing this story with you?

Because I believe there are times when something that seems random, impractical, or even irrational is important and deserves attention. On one level, it is understanding yourself and the situation enough to know that instant gratification will give you a sense of immediate reward, a jolt of what may be thought of as happiness or a brief escape, but it does not last.

Huh, that was heavy. But I will continue to roll with it.

Instead, giving yourself time to bypass the perceived feel-good of immediate gratification and instead giving space and processing time to why this random craving is happening may provide insight into something you are blocking, avoiding, or feeling.

Indeed, when you gift yourself this time – delaying gratification if you like – you may find that what you consider a want is actually a need. And it is a need that does not directly correlate to what you sense-wise crave.

As I was enjoying each bite of my glazed donut, I felt my smile and that body sense that happens when you inhale and exhale a deep breath. It was as if a burden had been lifted.

It could be because I finally fed the craving, but I think it was more than that. Yes, I felt a sense of accomplishment for resisting the temptation of the donut for so long. But I also recognized that eating the donut was not about my delighted taste bud craving but about emotions and memories I was sidestepping instead of sitting with and identifying.

My donut want helped me start processing some difficult happenings in my life. The want was actually a need.

So, my friend, what are you craving?

May you give the craving some time, gift yourself grace, figure out the why, and think through the need behind the want 💙.